Tuesday, December 8, 2015

一封让我看了流泪的信

虽然贵为苏丹后,但她也是妈妈的身份,儿子离开真的让她痛不欲生,白发人送黑发人,肝肠寸断!一直以来我很喜欢柔佛苏丹一家人,男的帅女的美,特别养眼呢!我也时常关注他们的社交网站,特别让我着迷的是三王子,我是他的小粉丝。他特别的帅也特别的瘦,后来google了一些关于他的,才知道他得了肝癌。生病前的他是多么的帅,浓眉大眼像足洋人的血统,而他身上确实有英国人,马来人,华人的血统。我本身是念中医的学生,略懂一些病症的知识。我知道肝癌痊愈的机会渺茫甚至是零巴仙,他还能存活多久呢?我并非诅咒他,而是很心痛一个如此善良有爱心的人要与癌症抗战!前两个星期背痛入院,已经有谣言传他离世了,苏丹还出来辟谣公开他在医院互动的照片!5/12/15在面子书得知他往生,当下搜寻所有关于他的面子书和instagram, instagram的帐户不再公开了,以前的照片都不见了!后来面子书也关闭了!今天无意中看到苏丹后的面子书写着想念儿子,还给儿子写了一封信,看到我的眼泪直流!那种失去儿子的痛失无法形容的,连我也感觉到她的痛!他的一生虽然短暂但他活得精彩,时常帮助有需要的人,他自己是病人但也去关心其他病人,聆听病人的需要,爱护动物,善心满满的菩萨!安息吧,偶像!
A letter to my son, Jalil :
My darling Lil,
I know the only reason you wanted to be in hospital was because you were in great pain but that you really wanted to be home : you've been in too many hospitals too many times. But Allah, in His Infinite wisdom, placed you there so that we, your family, would spend as much time as we could with you.
I have a thousand and one memories of you during your last days in this world.
I remember, once, you closed your eyes and tears flowed onto your cheeks, as you fought the pain, and I held your left hand and I wept, trying hard not to make any sounds. I thought you could not see me cry because your eyes were closed but you knew, and you put your right hand over mine and you patted it, as if you were saying, "Don't cry, I am all right."
I remember all the text messages you sent me. When I wrote that I was praying for you, you wrote back that you had prayed too, but that you had asked Allah to let you bear the burden of my worries.
When I looked at your grave, my heart ached with pain. I watched your father and your brothers fill it up with earth while Boo and Inah stood near me. I looked at your brothers and counted three sons. Boo was beside me. There are five of you. Where was my fifth son? And then I realised it was you who was missing. I had forgotten you were beneath the mounds of earth.
And I held up my hands and whispered "From You we come, and to You we return. I return to You, O Allah, my son."
May you be with the righteous, my son.

Thursday, August 20, 2015

他的心情平复了

吵架事件平息了,无论多么大男人的他,受伤伤心时依然像孩子一样讨肩膀!隐约知道他此时需要的我,他不肯回应我,我选择下班继续去上课!结果上课了他终于回应我了,觉得我不在乎他,结果提早离开课室直奔他家!有时候总觉得他不懂如何处理自己的情绪自己的东西,还要一幅逞强的样子,欠揍吧!吵了才来后悔,愧疚,这不是智者的行为,反而吓坏了伤害了父母的心,何必呢? 秉持着百善孝为先的信念,父母永远都是我们的最好的避风港,没有人可以再伟大的毫无怨言的保护自己的子女!伤害自己也伤透了父母的心,何必呢?
他的事情我自己也上了一课,要小心的处理,不会后果不堪设想。看了博客的幸福家庭游,小孩甜蜜的笑容让我的早上充满了阳光!谢谢你

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

无奈+无助

原本已经以为苦尽甘来了,哪知道突然又爆发了!我自以为我们之间的棱角逐渐磨平了,
但原来我错了!一旦他的脾气爆发就不可收拾了。就在今天突然收到一个信息说我们分手了!可以如此儿戏的就这样说结束了4年多的感情吗?我的心情出奇的平静,不知道是不是已经习惯他的儿戏,觉得不会是真的,但又好像哪里不对劲了,好像平静的优点奇怪!我发信息打电话都没有回应!男人到底要干嘛?找了一整天